It finally felt warm today, two days after the summer solstice. I always go into a sort of mourning at this time of the year. After June 21st, the days begin getting shorter. It doesn't seem right, somehow. Of course, on Dec 21st, I begin celebrating, because I know that the days from then on are longer. It somehow takes a little bite out of the frozen season.
I spent sometime last night cleaning out messages from our "sent" folder. We had ones going back to when R went through the GVH setback, starting November of 2005. It was really interesting reading all those old messages. Most of them were to Dr S in Boston, composed by me, since R was too sick or weak to sit at the computer. Just reading them, I could sense that tone of desperation. I really was on the edge. And of course the brunt of it happened in the dead of Winter, my worst time of year under normal circumstances. It's funny, as the time stretched on into Spring, there is a definite change in the tone of the emails. Of course, Rich was getting better by then. But I was relaxing with the warmer temps as well. And to have his 40th birthday party that Spring was really special. It was a real milestone to celebrate. Not just because he was turning 40, but also because we were on the recovery end of that brutal fight. I know that it was really something special for him to see so many of his friends, many of whom traveled from a far way off.
I guess it is good every once in a while to go back and see from where you have traveled. Boy was last night a big dose of perspective!!
Peace
C
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Over time you may find this blog to provide similar insight into your own personal history. We started a blog just for Max when he became ill as it was easier, emotionally, to write everything down once than to reiterate it and relive it for each of our friends who wanted to know how he was doing. Now that he is doing better it's interesting to back and see where we were back when it all started. We were also able to look at the family blog just before we knew he was sick and see signs that we hadn't noticed before. Anyway, may we all have a happy and healthy summer!
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